no one likes it, but its in our everyday lives. REJECTION, no matter the subtlety (?) it still burns in your inner most self.
i experience this today on top of another bad thing that occurred today!!! so things are going just dandy with me :( in my past blogs i have tried to have a solution to the problems i encounter whether they be good or bad but for this i have no remedy.
about 2 blogs ago i posted something along the lines of "is this the way love feels" well lets just say if thats love, i dont ever want to feel it again...
all i can tell you out there who read this (ellekensington) is that you just gotta get up and move on, lingering in the past will just renew the hurt that you hated to feel the 1st time.
keep your head held high, thats what i had to tell myself....its soothing the pain for now!
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Saturday, October 31, 2009
beatiful
i heard a song that i that just might be my fave! check it out...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DIhm94a-8SE
Thursday, October 29, 2009
my art!
if you guys didn't know, i'm an artist. a photographer to be exact and i think that my pictures have come a long way!!!
its hard trying to find inspiration in the small town i live in, but i have to work with what i got! if any of you who actually read are interested you can check me out at www.deviantart.com/jayratsu and if you want some pics taken of yourself i am more than willing to do so!
well of to go read my book! 'night
.........remember "we are all angels with one wing we need each other to soar."
its hard trying to find inspiration in the small town i live in, but i have to work with what i got! if any of you who actually read are interested you can check me out at www.deviantart.com/jayratsu and if you want some pics taken of yourself i am more than willing to do so!
well of to go read my book! 'night
.........remember "we are all angels with one wing we need each other to soar."
Thursday, October 1, 2009
Is this the way love feels?
in the past couple of weeks i have been having feelings for a close friend of mine, i think she is really cool and easy to talk to...when i'm not trying to send signals that i'm interested. hopefully she is also interested.
the reason i have been shying away from the topic is that i have had this happen twice or maybe three times before. let me tell you my friends it isn't a good feeling! i believe in making a situation as less awkward as possible, but i can't help but have that recurring thought in the back of my brain that says " GOD, Jay why did't you just keep your mouth shut and let your imagination be your reality?" but thats just the issue dreams aren't reality and we have to test the water in order to decide if we are going to swim...
...i think i'm about to dive in head first!
the reason i have been shying away from the topic is that i have had this happen twice or maybe three times before. let me tell you my friends it isn't a good feeling! i believe in making a situation as less awkward as possible, but i can't help but have that recurring thought in the back of my brain that says " GOD, Jay why did't you just keep your mouth shut and let your imagination be your reality?" but thats just the issue dreams aren't reality and we have to test the water in order to decide if we are going to swim...
...i think i'm about to dive in head first!
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Be grateful...
You know, sometimes i think that people don't understand the power preciousness of people in their lives even life itself. To have someone near to you suffer is never a good thing, and you feel as if you could take their pain for them.
I had a rush of emotions the other day when i found out my sister had to have emergency surgery. I was literally petrified, i had no words to express my feelings. With all of my siblings i never wanted them to feel any discomfort what so ever. And to be told this news made my heart sink.
My point in all of this is that every moment you have to tell someone you love you love them, DO IT! because even though this surgery wasn't life threatening, it felt like it was to me.
I had a rush of emotions the other day when i found out my sister had to have emergency surgery. I was literally petrified, i had no words to express my feelings. With all of my siblings i never wanted them to feel any discomfort what so ever. And to be told this news made my heart sink.
My point in all of this is that every moment you have to tell someone you love you love them, DO IT! because even though this surgery wasn't life threatening, it felt like it was to me.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Friends!
Everybody has them, but nobody has the friends i do.
this is a good and a bad thing, my friends are great, but they can be overwhelming and draining.
I think that my friends fail to see the physical exhaustion they cause me. they call on me in their time of need but when it is my time to have something poured into me they have nothing to give! i don't quite understand that. i know that when school starts back i am going to have to cut some people loose.
One would think that if i don't want to give more than i have in the past they would be able to see that i have nothing left in my jar to give. i have to go somewhere else where my jar is pulled from and restored at the same rate.
My biggest problem is that my "friends" think that there is nothing wrong with the way they treat. Now don't get me wrong i don't want pity of any sort, this blog is just my way of venting. and for those who read this your feedback is highly recommended!
Until next time, peace
this is a good and a bad thing, my friends are great, but they can be overwhelming and draining.
I think that my friends fail to see the physical exhaustion they cause me. they call on me in their time of need but when it is my time to have something poured into me they have nothing to give! i don't quite understand that. i know that when school starts back i am going to have to cut some people loose.
One would think that if i don't want to give more than i have in the past they would be able to see that i have nothing left in my jar to give. i have to go somewhere else where my jar is pulled from and restored at the same rate.
My biggest problem is that my "friends" think that there is nothing wrong with the way they treat. Now don't get me wrong i don't want pity of any sort, this blog is just my way of venting. and for those who read this your feedback is highly recommended!
Until next time, peace
Saturday, June 27, 2009
JOBS!!
Jobs!! They are a drag..I've have been trying to find one and its murder.
I applied to CVS, Target, and McDonalds (and i really don't want to work there) but money is money. the only reason I am so persistent is beacuse I am saving up for a Mac Book and as we all know they aren't cheap.
So hopefully before the summer is out I will have a job, but they way things are going now it doesn't look promising
I applied to CVS, Target, and McDonalds (and i really don't want to work there) but money is money. the only reason I am so persistent is beacuse I am saving up for a Mac Book and as we all know they aren't cheap.
So hopefully before the summer is out I will have a job, but they way things are going now it doesn't look promising
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
This is history in the making!
So this is it? I finally have a blog to call my own! this is my offical first post and there are nothing but great things to come fom this point on!! So.....enjoy!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)